She Looks Like One of Those Rap Guy's Girlfriends

I read today in the RedEye that the one thing Sarah Silverman will not do is make fat jokes about women. She said, "We live in a society where fat women don't deserve love."

I am pretty indifferent to Sarah Silverman in general. I think she is funny when I see her, but I don't actively seek out her comedy. That is probably the problem with her career in general. However, she gained my respect with this comment.

This comes fresh on the heels of my being called a "fat ass" twice by a drunk girl last night, simply because I had the audacity to walk around her. To be fair to her, she just could not manage to walk in her heels, despite her boyfriend/guy friend repeatedly telling her to just take them off. She refused to do so, or even take the hem of her pants out of her one shoe, and really, I should have just waited patiently for her to get where she was going, walking ten steps behind, not marring her vision with my huge exposed calves marching along, unhindered by three inch heels or long pants. She probably didn't think I could move that fast and was startled by me walking around her at such a rate, especially when she was teetering to begin with. I should resume my reclusive lifestyle, hiding in my room watching Sandra Bullock films and eating Muncho's, because when I go out, man, do I fuck with skinny women's lifestyles.

Of course, this is not the first time I have been called fat by a stranger on the street -- the most notable instance happened when a teenager on a bike catcalled at me, and then without missing a beat said, "Nevermind, you fat." It made me particularly angry, however, that a woman did it. Sometimes women make me sad with their treatment of other women -- and then John McCain goes and essentially tells America that he is using a woman simply as a vessel by making her his VP, and I wonder when we will ever win.

The funny thing about this is that I am probably not really fat -- I am smaller than the average American woman, even though I am thick. But still, apparently there is a girl even thinner than you waiting to call you a lard, despite how hard you work, despite how much you do, despite how you may feel about yourself. That's great for the sisterhood. But you know, I could have pointed out that compared to that lady who hasn't eaten in 14 years, the drunk trixie is a fat ass. I also could have pointed out that there are TONS of calories in alcohol. But she seemed busy trying to teach herself to walk, so I didn't want to distract her.

But at least Sarah Silverman has our back. Our rolly, rolly backs.